Dear Tumor,
How have you been so far? I can't feel your existence anymore. However, the side effects are still there. This weekend is the toughest throughout the treatment. I thought having chemotherapy the 6th time, I would have gotten used to it by now, but I guess the effects are accumulative. I feel like the whole body falls in the wrong place. Harder to put my mindfulness into practice. Nonetheless, nothing a person can't cope with. What's the worst thing that could happen? Vomiting non-stop or not able to eat much? I do feel better after my evening chanting and meditation.
Mind over matters. I told myself.
As for my mum, sometimes, I feel like I'm hard on her. Like I have a certain expectation on her, or perhaps I'm just grumpy from the side effects.
It's also hard for me to face her when she is around, I have to pretend I feel okay and not letting her upset by my condition. No matter what, it's difficult for her to be calm and rational when her son is having cancer. I'm sure she is confused at certain times why this happen. Even though I've explained to her, accept it and move on with it, don't let the emotions make her depress further, she is always on the pessimistic side of the coin. I just wish all this will be over very soon for her. Then, she is happier.
Till then, I hope you’ll dissolve and evolve into better cell soon.
Cheers,
Your Host
How have you been so far? I can't feel your existence anymore. However, the side effects are still there. This weekend is the toughest throughout the treatment. I thought having chemotherapy the 6th time, I would have gotten used to it by now, but I guess the effects are accumulative. I feel like the whole body falls in the wrong place. Harder to put my mindfulness into practice. Nonetheless, nothing a person can't cope with. What's the worst thing that could happen? Vomiting non-stop or not able to eat much? I do feel better after my evening chanting and meditation.
Mind over matters. I told myself.
As for my mum, sometimes, I feel like I'm hard on her. Like I have a certain expectation on her, or perhaps I'm just grumpy from the side effects.
It's also hard for me to face her when she is around, I have to pretend I feel okay and not letting her upset by my condition. No matter what, it's difficult for her to be calm and rational when her son is having cancer. I'm sure she is confused at certain times why this happen. Even though I've explained to her, accept it and move on with it, don't let the emotions make her depress further, she is always on the pessimistic side of the coin. I just wish all this will be over very soon for her. Then, she is happier.
Till then, I hope you’ll dissolve and evolve into better cell soon.
Cheers,
Your Host
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