One of the things I've learned so profoundly is counting my blessing. I know it sounds easy but it's not when you woke up everyday facing the harsh radiotherapy and the weekly draining chemotherapy. Instead, I woke up everyday, dizzy with gratitude (maybe the side effects haha!) counting my blessing, gratified by the blessings I've received.
The fluctuations of better day and worse day is just days I have to undergo, nonetheless, It's just any other day. When I find my conditions are miserable because the windows of my eyes and ears have been left open for too long, I allow all the external conditions to shape my mind, my thoughts. I look inside myself for comfort, my mind to be specific. I feel like I'm a victim of my own body (casing) and my perceptions, my body is sick but my mind is not and that's where I find my bliss. Taking refuge in the island of my mind.
I truly believe Loss is Gain and Gain is loss. And I see each of the gain and loss as it is. It's always a grey area. Just like good days and bad days. It's interconnected.
Everything I count blessing, I'm also not thinking of my own suffering. I can't cause every time I count my blessing every night, I can’t
contain myself and cried, after that you realized there is nothing much to
complain, curse or swear about.
For all I know, counting blessing and be grateful is better
than enduring a shitty day.
"You cannot be grateful and bitter.
You cannot be grateful and unhappy.
You cannot be grateful and without hope.
You cannot be grateful and unloving.
So just be grateful."
Kyle, your blog is great! Its important to share yourself with others, especially in times of difficulty. We all have our own battles we face on a daily basis. It helps to know that we're not alone, that others go through the similar experiences. Keep strong, and keep counting those blessings because everyday we have on this Earth is a moment to feel and live something amazing, no matter if its painful or full of happiness! You're not alone brother.
ReplyDelete~AJ
Dear buddy! Thanks for the encouragement! I have a feeling everyone is struggling daily regardless rich, poor, healthy or unhealthy. Best to keep our mentality and perception in tune with the accordance of Dharma, that's what that blesses me at the end of the day! Love ya!!!
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